I always struggled to say “no” without feeling guilty until I learned these 8 simple phrases

Ever been in that awkward spot where someone asks you for a favor and your brain screams “absolutely not” while your mouth somehow says “sure, no problem”?

Yeah, me too.

For years, I was the guy who said yes to everything.

Extra shifts at work? Of course.

Help someone move on my only free weekend?

Why not.

Take on yet another project when I was already drowning?

Apparently, that was my specialty.

The worst part wasn’t even the overwhelm—it was the crushing guilt that followed whenever I did manage to decline something. I’d spend hours replaying the conversation, wondering if I’d hurt someone’s feelings or damaged a relationship.

But here’s what changed everything: I discovered that saying no doesn’t require elaborate justifications or lengthy apologies. Sometimes, the simplest phrases are the most powerful.

Today, I’m sharing the exact words that helped me set boundaries without the guilt trip. Let’s dive in.

1. “I’m not available”

This might sound almost too simple, but it’s incredibly powerful.

For the longest time, I thought I needed to give detailed explanations for why I couldn’t do something. I’d craft these elaborate stories about my schedule, my commitments, my dog’s imaginary vet appointment—you name it.

But here’s the thing: you don’t owe anyone a detailed breakdown of your life.

“I’m not available” is a complete sentence. It’s honest, it’s direct, and it doesn’t invite negotiation or guilt-tripping.

The beauty of this phrase is that it covers everything—your time, your energy, your mental bandwidth. You’re simply not available for that particular request, and that’s perfectly valid.

2. “That doesn’t work for me”

This phrase became my secret weapon when I realized how often I was twisting myself into pretzels to accommodate other people’s needs.

Instead of launching into explanations about why something won’t work—your schedule, your priorities, your sanity—this phrase puts the focus on fit rather than fault.

It’s not about the other person being wrong for asking. It’s not about you being deficient for declining. It’s simply about compatibility.

I love this one because it feels neutral and factual. When someone invites you to a networking event at 6 AM on Saturday, you don’t need to explain that you’re not a morning person or that weekends are sacred. You can simply say, “That doesn’t work for me.”

It’s remarkably freeing once you realize that something not working for you is reason enough to pass.

3. “I have other priorities right now”

This one hit different for me because it reframes the entire conversation.

Instead of making it sound like you’re just busy or overwhelmed, this phrase acknowledges that you’re making conscious choices about where to invest your time and energy.

And honestly? That’s exactly what you’re doing.

When you say yes to one thing, you’re automatically saying no to something else. Maybe it’s family time, maybe it’s a personal project, or maybe it’s simply the mental space you need to recharge.

I used to feel guilty about having priorities that didn’t align with what others wanted from me. But then I realized that having clear priorities isn’t selfish—it’s responsible.

This phrase works because it’s impossible to argue with. Of course you have priorities. Everyone does. And yours are just as valid as anyone else’s.

4. “I can’t commit to that right now”

This phrase saved me from so much regret.

There’s something honest about acknowledging that you can’t fully commit to something. It’s not about capability—it’s about bandwidth and intentionality.

I used to say yes to things thinking I could somehow make it work later, even when I knew deep down I was already stretched thin. The result? Half-hearted efforts, missed deadlines, and a whole lot of stress.

“I can’t commit to that right now” recognizes that good intentions aren’t enough. If you can’t give something the attention it deserves, it’s better to be upfront about it.

The “right now” part is key because it doesn’t burn bridges. It simply acknowledges that this particular moment isn’t the right time for this particular commitment.

It’s honest, it’s respectful, and it saves everyone involved from disappointment down the road.

5. “I need to check my schedule and get back to you”

This one gave me something I desperately needed: time to think.

For years, I felt pressured to give immediate answers to requests. Someone would ask me to help with something, and I’d feel this weird obligation to respond on the spot—usually with a reluctant yes.

But here’s what I learned: you’re allowed to take time before committing to things.

This phrase buys you space to actually consider whether you want to do something, whether you have the capacity, and whether it aligns with your priorities. No more knee-jerk responses that you’ll regret later.

The best part? Most people respect this approach. It shows you take commitments seriously rather than just throwing out casual responses.

Use this time wisely, though. Actually check your schedule, think it through, and then give a clear answer—even if that answer is no.

6. “I’m focusing on other things right now”

This phrase acknowledges that focus requires saying no to distractions.

I’ve talked about this before, but our attention is probably our most valuable resource. When you’re working toward specific goals—whether personal or professional—protecting your focus becomes crucial.

This phrase works because it positions your “no” as part of a larger strategy, not just avoidance or laziness. You’re not rejecting the opportunity because it’s bad; you’re declining because it doesn’t serve your current direction.

It’s particularly useful for those “good but not great” opportunities that can derail your progress. You know the ones—they sound interesting, they might be fun, but they’re not moving you toward where you actually want to go.

Using this phrase helped me realize that saying no to good things often means saying yes to great things.

7. “That’s not something I can help with”

Sometimes the most honest thing you can say is that you’re simply not the right person for the job.

This phrase removes the personal element entirely. It’s not about your schedule, your priorities, or your willingness. It’s about fit and capability.

Maybe someone’s asking for help with something outside your expertise. Maybe they need skills you don’t have or connections you can’t provide. Maybe you genuinely think someone else would serve them better.

I used to feel guilty about admitting I wasn’t the right fit for something, as if acknowledging limitations was somehow failing. But there’s actually something generous about directing people toward better solutions rather than offering mediocre help out of guilt.

This phrase lets you decline while keeping the focus on what’s best for everyone involved.

8. “I’m not taking on any new commitments”

This became my go-to during particularly busy or overwhelming periods.

There’s something powerful about having a blanket policy. It removes the need to evaluate each request individually and potentially get sucked into lengthy explanations or negotiations.

When I first started using this phrase, I was surprised by how well people responded to it. Most understood that everyone goes through seasons where they need to protect their bandwidth.

The key is being consistent. If you say you’re not taking on new commitments, don’t make exceptions unless it’s truly extraordinary. Otherwise, people will learn that your boundaries aren’t really boundaries—they’re just suggestions.

This phrase also helps you recognize when you’re at capacity before you hit complete burnout. It’s a form of self-preservation that ultimately lets you show up better for the commitments you do have.

Final words

Learning to say no without guilt wasn’t an overnight transformation for me. It took practice, a few awkward conversations, and definitely some moments where I slipped back into old patterns.

But here’s what I discovered: the people who matter most in your life will respect your boundaries. The ones who don’t? Well, that tells you something important too.

These eight phrases aren’t magic words that will eliminate all discomfort around saying no. Sometimes it will still feel awkward. Sometimes you might second-guess yourself.

But what they do offer is a way to decline requests that feels honest, respectful, and guilt-free. They help you remember that protecting your time and energy isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.

Start with whichever phrase feels most natural to you. Practice it in low-stakes situations first. And remember, you don’t need to justify having boundaries to anyone.

Your time is yours. Your energy is yours. And how you choose to spend both is entirely up to you.